In a Chapel Far Far Away

How do you continue not to despise me as much I do myself?

then set out to make
                                    sure
i do

Autumn falls
in colours i have
never seen
russet have i known
yellow, orange
blue and green

but these
                 these
plains of weld and woad,
lichen brush and madder sky,
blends of barley, bark, and berry
do not fit my mind

hours south,  life
times away,
‘gainst  screens of
ebon backsplash,
silver nitrate shadows slip
                                           poison
‘cross my eye

her heavy hair
                          (what colour now?)
her full-lipped smile
                         (why does she now?)
her infant hands
clasped over swell
                         (what if now?  what if now?  what if now?)

and you have
                       left
me

here to watch
these scenes
alone

you
        You
have
         left

How do you continue not to despise me as much I do myself?

perhaps i do
                      perhaps perhaps perhaps
i
do
      now

© s rogers 16 october 2010

9 thoughts on “In a Chapel Far Far Away

  1. Sadness is at its least destructive when we acknowlege it and maybe find a bit or a lot of beauty in its expression. Sad here, indeed, but eloquently stated, bringing a tinge of smile to my heart like the shimmer of the moon peeking out on a stormy night.

  2. CatGem says:

    Bill, i can’t thank you enough for understanding — it means more to me thank you know

  3. katley says:

    love this Kitty…the autumn backdrop is especially poignant, and brings out the sadness in this piece.

  4. forpuck says:

    I finally had the peace around me to read this properly, and the melody of it made sense now. Really liked it. There’s a smoothness, a ride taking you away into the dark kind of vibe…

  5. CatGem says:

    thank you, forpuck — when i repeat words it really is all about the “feeling” — especially when the piece is read aloud

  6. june says:

    As beautiful as this is, the sadness is there in every line. I was reminded of a feeling of deep loss that I’ve felt a few times in my life.

Thank you for letting me know you were here.

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