Assignation

i did not remember
                (as i so often do)
until i saw it in her hand

I gave you that,
i said without thought
You did? she asked, un
abashedly

she did not remember
                     (as she so often does)
and began to turn and turn and
turn
the lavalliere,
as though one
                        turn
might be  
right,
might be   
key,
might re
cover
all she has
                    lost

Yes, i nodded,
                       watching
the silver gold trail
from her crumpled
fingers to her criss
crossed palm

it had come from
                              Him
one piece of a set
given at some
sort
of gifting
               time

There were earrings, i said
I don’t think so, she said
Yes, i said, there were ear
ings, i said.  I kept them,
i said, and gave
                           this
to you.

Ok, she said,
                   (as she so often does)
unable, unwilling, too
                                      tired
to contest

But, she asked.  Why?

this i could not
answer
this i did not
                 (do not)
know, and
                   she,
having finally
become
who life has
made her,
accepted
                 my
ignorance
without debate

Well, you should take it back
now,
she said, pressing the
cold to my hand.  It looks so
much like you,
she said.  Not 
like me at all,
she said.  So, take it
back now.  Wear it,
she said, with the
earrings.

I don’t know, i whispered,
                                             where
they are.
I don’t know
, i whispered,
                                             what
has
become of them.

lifting the pendant
to the light, i re
called the
                  bite
of diamonds as
they pavé’d
                     down
my lobes, i re
called the
                brush
of  pearls
dangling
              silk
against my skin

                      (where were they)
                      (what happened)

were they hurled
from the topless
car,
across the creaking
deck,
into the muddied
waters
             or
were they
                (simply)
left behind

one tangled in
                         his
bed,
another in
                   his,
both
bloodied
ripped out
un
recovered
                     Lost
in some long ago
night
of striving to
                     Forget

Mommy,
i said to the
dusky mirror,
I have mis
                     laid
so much.

her grey eyes
                  (so unlike mine)
watched us un
flinchingly

I know, sugar.
                       (said the mouth we share)
But it doesn’t matter. 
Wear it anyway.

 

©s rogers 13 december 2010, all rights reserved

Thank you for letting me know you were here.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s